Toys

Play is an important part of any baby or child's life. When we  think of play our minds usually travel first to toys.  Toys have a wonderful place in a child's life, but toys are often overrated. Mom's worry about having enough toys or the newest toy. If you could never buy a toy, I don't think your child would be the least deprived or harmed. The best part of a child's life is discovering. Nothing can take the place of exploring the real world and discovering all it has to hold. We forget that our world is new and extraordinary to a little mind.  Children should have the freedom to explore and experience their world at their own pace and choosing. Their job is to learn unfettered and free as much as possible. A child in a playpen or fenced area of the home with a menagerie of toys is being robbed of true exploration and discovery. They are given an artificial world, and that which is pretend can never take the place of the real living, breathing world around us. As little barriers and boundaries as possible are best for the education of a child. Toys can be wonderful learning tools and have their place, but they too often are the only focus and experience parents allow in a small child’s life. 

No toy ever compares with mud. 

This is how it looks on our home front. If my little boy wants to open the cabinets, that should be ok. If he wants to unload and load the shelves that is also ok. He should be allowed to touch the broom and even at six months try to “sweep” even if that’s nothing more than holding the handle and squealing as he sways it back and forth. The house to as much of its entirety as possible is open to him. From the first few month, a child is perceiving and developing the attitude and perspective about life that will be carried with him into adulthood. Our attitude and method by which we live has a huge impact on our little ones. I spend a ton of time in the kitchen it seems. I have two cabinets in my kitchen locked. One has cleaning supplies and the other has my better breakable glass dishes. Everything else dangerous is on a top shelf out of my little man’s current interest area. When I unload the dishwasher, I load the knives last and unload them first. This allows him complete access to the dishwasher and all its contents. Work should be something a child wants to be included in and cares about from the very beginning. We should consider our daily work a delight and the only way to communicate that to our children is by including them joyfully. Sweep with your little one in a sling and let him hold the handle. Soon, it will be time for him to have his own little broom. Will he be much help? Probably not, but that’s hardly the point. Wash dishes with your helper sitting in the other sink doing his own “washing”. Take care of chores with the little one included as much as possible. With a little creativity, even a baby can be included in almost every task.  In almost all of my life I try to include him even if that can only be observation. My little man’s favorite toys are often his new daily find in the tupperware bin or the canned goods shelf.

His favorite lid and notice the little potato he fetched from
bin in the background. 

Some people would say I should teach him to leave those things alone and play with his own toys, but I don’t think segregating a young life from ours is really that healthy or beneficial. Exploring the canned goods is just the first step in learning to stack them for mommy. Play becomes work and work becomes play in a seamless progression. Small children may not be able to do everything just like we do, but they carry in them a great and persistent desire to be part of our daily life. We do children a disservice by making their world one that is catered to and revolves around them. They need to be included in our world, but not the center of it.  We best teach children not by creating fences around them, but by helping them learn to understand and operate in the real world, our world. A babies job is to explore and learn. My job is to facilitate this learning process and guide it gently. I don’t control his learning. I do observe and then provide what he needs. Toys alone can never provide this beautiful and necessary step in learning and growing. 

A glass makes a great find to play with.

Now that I’ve explained how overrated toys can be and how important including little ones in our world is, I will also tell you that I LOVE toys. I love discovering fun new ones, making them, and finding out all they can teach. A few truly well made and purposeful toys are a delight and wonderful experience for any child and some adults. We may think that small babies do not notice quality or quantity, but we are wrong. A child absorbs more in those first few years about how their world should be than at any other time. Poor quality and great quantities of piled toys create a lasting impression of cheapness and clutter. One doesn't need a lot of money to live with quality. Quality not quantity makes all the difference. The are two problems with too many toys. First, if they are not well organized, the little one only senses chaos. Even babies appreciate a well organized and orderly environment. They are born with this appreciation and we would do well to foster this natural tendency towards neatness and order. Too many toys are also distracting and over stimulating.  A baby constantly stimulated at every angle by a different toy is not truly allowed to discover what is in front of them fully or allowed to explore the real world without distraction. Constant stimulation from new, different, exciting, and artificial sources sets the stage for the need to be entertained. A child should learn to explore and entertain themselves, even alone. Our society is far too overstimulated and entertained. We have lost the ability to discover the deep joys and wonders of the simple things in life. Enjoying our world for what it is, what is truly is, seeing our world instead of seeking some new thrilling artificial stimulation, and discovering the hidden gems of real, natural life is a skill few these days possess. This is what I want my children to learn. Discovering life, real life begins early.